Thursday, February 24, 2011


About a week and a half ago I bought 12 new rolls of toilet paper. Aaaaawwwww. All stocked up. Good for awhile. No? Well, my drawer of toilet paper is now empty. We didn't use it all up in some crazy toilet-loving illness. My son, Joshua, has some kind of fetish with toilet paper in the toilet. Some kids unroll the toilet paper, making a lovely, snowy-white mess. Not mine. No, he loves to stick in whole rolls! There's no saving it.
This is one roll of toilet paper from this morning, and because he couldn't see the other one hiding under a towel he threw in a new scrubby.

I was good about keeping the bathroom door shut for most of the day. Then it was bath time. He always goes first, right after dinner. Then it was Sarah's turn. He snuck in before I shut the door and, of course, made a big stink about being taken out and shut out. I didn't care. My bathroom (and toilet paper) was safe for the time being. Then it was time for Sarah to get out and she called for me to get her robe off the hook. As I got Sarah her robe and towel Joshua quickly ran in and tossed a handful of brand new Kleenex into the tub. I said, "Josh, what is it with you putting paper products in the water?" I was out of the bathroom for about one minute. Max. When I came back in Joshua was standing by the draining tub. He had tossed in Sarah's towel and the towel that was on the floor for drying our wet feet. I went out to get the camera - already composing this post!- and when I came back in he had tossed Sarah's clothes on the pile, too. My blood was seriously starting to boil. Really. My face was getting hot and my breathing was becoming rapid. So, I took the picture, rung out the towels, and started the washer.

This is Joshua pointing to his mess and "saying", "it's not just paper mom, I like to put anything in water!"

As I returned to the bathroom I heard a splash and yelled, "NO!" Yep, you guessed it. He'd found the last roll of toilet paper and plopped it in the toilet.
By now I'd had it, and he was going straight to bed. I picked him up and carried him to the kitchen. Set him down and proceeded to fill his sippy cup with milk. As I put the milk back in the fridge I noticed his medicine that he needed to take. So, I was getting that when he reached up to grab the sippy cup - minus the lid. No, I was quick, and this time it didn't spill. I put the lid on and went back to the medicine and heard a splash and a cry. You have to understand that he was on one side of the sink and I was on the other. Pretty close, but not enough to notice that instead of reaching for his sippy cup that now had a lid he was reaching for (and got) Sarah's cup of water. It spilled all down his front and all over the floor. I gave him his medicine, grabbed him and his milk and we set off for bed. Is it wrong to want to build him a cage?


Elizabeth "Betsy" said...

And I forgot to mention the day he shoved 5 rolls in before I found him! At least he can't flush it. YET!

Jaime said...

haha, wow. Aren't you glad this stage doesn't last forever!?

Margaret said...

LOL! Watch out, he'll be the kid that tries to see if he can stick toilet paper to the ceiling.